A Colony of Clones

One of the great joys of travelling is that for a while you can shed your bondages & identities to a given place and can yourself fully to all the new you see and experience.

In that spirit am reflecting on my recent trip to downtown Chicago – mostly the corporate America side – within downtown. 

Clones. That’s the word that comes back so strongly every-time I go back there. You see a humanity of clones. Starts with the clothes boots, coats, the body language, everyone sure confident, taking big strides, the looks on the faces, the look of being in control, in charge of ones’ destiny. I choose, my life, a look of I know me and myself. The tone of the voice, the responses, the “Hey Good Morning!” Yes, almost everyone says it the same way. Big and bold and ‘almost’ beautiful (on the outside) in everything. Get off the elevator go stand in the cue for – Starbucks – everyone does that. A big paper cup in the hand, the other one in the pocket and stand there waiting for your turn, pick up a banana on the way out and hail! Corporate America we the warriors, general’s leaders are ready to serve you and the world.

Phew! as I manage to find my work desk and put the big cup of Starbucks away I feel so tired. And I wonder what tires me. All I did was walk up to my work desk after a good sleep of 10 hours, a big breakfast and a 10 min walk to work. I don’t have an answer. I just feel tired very weighed down. With all the big -ness and the bold-ness around me I feel so small. Am human. Am i? are we all supposed to be so perfectly turned up all the time, is everything so sorted and is everyone so “with it”? Can I be myself? 

Did we all wake up the same side of the bed today? The cereal the workout the coffee the banana and the double strength capsules, all probably do make us all feel look the same. I make a mental note – I need to pick up the banana before I leave star bucks, that’s what will help me get the energy.

The meetings begin. As I scramble my way I feel I am getting the glimpses of the humanness behind the plastered facades. In a very articulate way, people do talk about where they need help, where things are going wrong, they want to reach out. I see I am smiling a lot more. I start feeling better I feel I am in touch connecting with real people. And its 12 pm. Time for lunch. As you leave the meeting room I can feel things change, you don’t carry one space into the other. Lunch is about baseball, soccer, concerts festivals. Yes, almost everyone has a hobby. You have your list of sports, music, travels you talk to. And you get back to work.

The days ends and I go back to my hotel feeling this sense of loneliness which is unexplainable, as I just walked amongst hundreds of brethren on the swanky well laid out streets of Chicago downtown amongst the best the world has to offer in terms of infrastructure. I spent my time in a room of 15 people interacting talking. I think its jet lag. I switch on the TV and scroll through channels. I stop as I start watching a documentary on Chicago the South Side and learn that it’s been the bloodiest year possible with over 4000 dead. I learn about single mothers, failing medical insurance and how homeless are coping with their lives on the streets of Chicago. The people on TV seemed so much more real. Without the facades, the plastic expressions they looked frail, in pain, genuinely joyful as and when they smiled. Frail, vulnerable but so beautiful oh so beautiful. 

As I scrolled more and started getting a real feel of what life is like for people living in America’s Chicago, I got a sense – outside the big glass, spotlessly clean facades – inside there is mayhem blood pain life. Strangely I felt better. It all made sense now. Trump was President for no reason – they didn’t “have it all” or they were not “with it”. 

I switched off the TV feeling a lot lighter and laughing to myself that essentially I was dealing with the creations of Corporate America – the same who created Barbie dolls – once you know a Barbie for a Barbie you know what to do next – just switch off.